Tag Archives: relationship advice

Arnold Schwarzenegger and the unbearable lateness of monogamy

An up-close and personal account of infidelity from a Soul’s Code contributor goes deeper than the public contritions of governors, celebrities and other cheaters

BY CASSANDRA KELLY — Sometimes, to amuse myself, I think about the parallels between my life and the lives of those that our society has deemed “famous” or “stars.” For instance, I grew up in poverty — so did Gloria Estefan.  I’m a pilates lover and so is Jen Anniston.

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What to feed a marriage

What to feed a marriage

To make a relationship work, forget about needs. Love is fueled by desire – the kind that comes from the heart, not the hormones.

BY DAVID RICKEY — John Mellencamp is hurting so good, splitting from wife number three after 20 years together. Tiger Woods and Sandra Bullock made headlines in 2010 as the antagonist and victim (respectively) in two other, particularly nasty celebrity breakups. For the general population in the U.S. the rate of divorce is 2.5 times what it was 20 years ago. As for the 100 million or so Americans over 18 who are unmarried, how many just can’t be bothered?

Marriage is falling out of favor, and from my perspective there are two prime reasons for this. First, there are the legal issues — both of getting married and getting unmarried — that make people skittish about entering into the contracts marriage entails, and seeing the huge difficulties of breaking those contracts. But the second reason is what concerns me here.

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How to make every day a sacred day

Rev. Criss Ittermann is a quadruple-threat: Interfaith minister, shamanic practioner, Reiki master and life coach. Here, she coaches you out of singleton “panic mode”.

GUEST COLUMN: REV. CRISS ITTERMANN, 1st of 2 parts Valentine’s Day is not just for lovers, and doesn’t consist solely of icons like chocolates, flowers, diamonds, and romantic engagements.

Together we can transform it into the holiday of sacred and unconditional love.  It is possible to take an over-commoditized holiday and turn it into a sacred celebration of the spiritual side of love.

Rather than turning the day’s passion inwards to only the very closest people in our lives — or worse, making it into a pity party for the single person without a date — why not go to great lengths to expand the circle of those you love, express love to, and experience a divine connection with?

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Love is the antonym of separation

“How I use every single experience to teach me about expanding my awareness of love”

GUEST COLUMN: CARI LA GRANGE MURPHY — How do we allow the love in our hearts to permeate our experience and enhance the quality of our lives? From personal experience I have learned that a daily, conscious choice is necessary for me to actively engage the spark of light within me and within everyone I encounter throughout my day.

When I approach every interaction with the intention of finding commonality and equality between us, I experience a feeling of unity and connection.

Conversely, when I judge an individual or a situation, I feel a sense of anxiety and separation that doesn’t resonate well with my heart and my spirit.

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Let’s play truth and consequences

My world is perfectly designed for me, perhaps yours is too

BY DAVID RICKEY — Sometime in high school I decided that I could do anything I wanted to, as long as I was willing to accept the consequences. It was a somewhat naïve and “adolescent” choice, but it has stuck with me.

However, my awareness has deepened considerably, and the truth behind that choice has become richer and more complex. I still believe that I am a completely free agent, meaning that my choices are my own. I bear responsibility for them and for the resulting “events.”

I am now aware that there is a more primal and profound energy behind my being here that, although it doesn’t direct or control my choices, exercises an amazingly mysterious and wonderful power.

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Why the ‘love business’ is recession-proof

Cupid’s Coach.com founder Julie Ferman answers questions from Soul’s Code about the boom in the love business, and “What is an aura mixer”?

SOUL’S CODE — According to varied forms of spiritual practice and to the discipline of parapsychology, all of us are surrounded by an “aura” — a field of faint and glowing radiation.  You have probably had the experience of meeting people who seem to exude love, fun, anger or hate — even before they utter a word.

Julie Ferman uses auras to help singles connect. She hosts Aura Mixers and Flirt Parties. Julie is an expert in these matters: She launched the matchmaking service Cupid’s Coach in the last recession after 9/11 and the dot.com bust.

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LOVE SCROLL: The Best Thing

What’s the best thing anybody has ever told you about yourself?

BY ANONYMOUS — I’ll start it off with a letter I got from my girlfriend today:

“Darling, I want to thank you for something: to thank you for being with me. Because if I would have never met you, I would never do a third of what I have done. You are my biggest inspiration and motivation. You are my star and I love you so much.”

Sometimes somebody tells you something like that and it fills you with joy. Those special words can turn your day or your life around. It can be the perfect antidote to the Pain Body Index, a mantra of worth and wellness. Try it out. Just typing it will make you feel better, guaranteed.

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